Wednesday, March 18, 2015

Making Memories

The fair opened it's gates last week.

Spring has sprung. 

The weather is crisp.

Flowers are blooming and all is well in my heart. 

We had a lovely time.  The kids laughed.  The kids behaved.  The kids held hands. The kids fell asleep before we even exited the parking lot.

I on the other hand ...

Photo Credit: @breathintheair
worried about them touching anything

worried that they would get lost

worried about them not being secure on the rides

worried about all the sugar and processed food

I think it might have shown on my face but once they were on those rides, hands in the air, yelling with joy, that was my moment.  My moment to be present and to realize we just made a memory for them. 

Photo Credit: @breathintheair
I think once you
become a mom worry just comes
along with the position.  But in that moment I wasn't
going to allow the worry to rob me of the joy.  We
had an amazing time and look forward to
next year. 


Thursday, March 5, 2015

I am that I am

 Utkata Konasana or Goddess Pose
Layer by Layer I removed all I thought I was, all I thought I had to be
and in the moment I was left standing naked and vulnerable
 without identities and labels. 
 I remembered... I am that I am.
Lenita Vangellis

It's fitting to me that tonight on the night of a full moon I completed the final requirement for my Yoga Certification.  It has been a long and sometimes difficult journey of exploration and self inquiry but on this very night as I look up at the moon I once again realize that there is so much more out there, so much more to discover and that the journey is never truly over. 

My love for yoga started three years ago when awareness hit me without warning.  Little did I know God was preparing me for that one ah ha moment in which I would awake.  After that moment my life would not be the same.  Once you become aware you can not undo it.  I looked at the moon, stars, and people differently.  I felt things in my body differently. I became more aware of my thoughts and actions. I reacted with mindfulness.  I have to say my world was becoming bigger, brighter and more alive.  I became addicted to this high of awareness as I call it.  It was almost as though I were literally born again.  My world was different.  Yoga provided an outlet to my emotional and physical healing during a tough period in my life.   I've learned that we carry so many of our emotions in our bodies and with mindfulness, moving the body and calming the mind some of those physical and emotional aliments can eventually begin to get better. 

Two years into my Yoga Journey things aligned perfectly and landed me with an exceptional group of classmates and two beautiful souls who would guide me to holding space for my future students with mindfulness, presence, love and compassion.  This course was not easy but it wasn't meant to be.  During my Yoga Teacher Training my instructors took me to uncomfortable places and I learned to walk through them and grow through the process.  We can not jump over a wound or skip a box like we do when play hopscotch.  Healing and the journey to healing is not a game we must go through it.  We must learn to see it, accept it and move forward with growth.  Walking through my pain with awareness allowed me to gain confidence and regain hope.  

Growth is my inspiration.  With the knowledge I was gaining through books, my practice and meditation I was inspired to help others walk through their journey.  The more classes I guided the more confidant I became, the more I understood that each and every one of us is just seeking peace and connection.